Category Archives: Uncategorized

A Poem — Strange Clouds – Where are my Sharp Blue Skies?

(Intro to Poem) A few months ago, a Poem came to me, while reading the excellent “Water for Elephants” book, by Sarah Gruen, (without giving the story away), at a certain point, in the story,   Pg 111, the (now old) character says:

…I roll onto my side and stare…at the ‘blue sky beyond… “The sky, the sky, the sky—same as it always was.

I too, remember blue skies, so bright, they hurt the eye—now, but a long-forgotten memory. My answer to his Revelry about the “sameness” of the “blue sky” is stated in the Poem below 

💎STRANGE CLOUDS💎,
by Clarisse Dodge cc 2017 Creative Commons,
See Notes on Bottom, for Additional Info, see note below;

Admiringly-Dedicated to Mr. Dane Wigington, Founder and Tireless Clarion, on these “Strange Clouds” issue of: “Geoengineering Watch Global.”

I don’t know where you’re coming from,
Telling me the skies are always “blue;”


All I can see, in the skies are
cloudy days, when clouds even appear ‘brown’;

When the “blue” does come up,
The sky appears “Faded;
Yet, I’m Old enough to Remember…

Sharp, Clear, Crisp, BLUE Skies,
So Sharp Blue,
it hurt mine own Eyes…,
Those skies, those skies, those skies…

Tho’ Some have Awoken, to the Truth of the Matter,
A Great number o’ Others, still Choose…,
…to continue their Slumber;
Afraid, perhaps, to Face the Unthinkable,
they cannot yet Abide.

These sleepy Ones, bury their heads, in the sand!

WHAT, EXACTLY, I ASK MYSELF,
will it take, to Gently—oh, so gently,
Help’m to Remember, they’re but Slumbering,
and it’s past the Waking-up and Act Time?

For, You See, Neither them,
nor the Maleficent, amongst us…,
Comprehend All These,
last, but a Moment!

When the Sun Shines through, once again;
And the Unusual, Strange Clouds are No More;
What a Marvelous Sky, Indeed,


We’ll have, to Witness…,

AS IT BRIGHTENS, TRUE, CLEAN, and CRISP,
or, WITH TRUE, LIFE-GIVING, LIVING CLOUDS;

A Sky SO DEEP, and BLUE,
as if a liquefied Blue Topaz Gem was Spread
from East to West, from North to South…,
and Everywhere in between.

(Mr. Jankowsky), I Know, from mine Own Eyes,
how Priviledged You’ve been,
never to’ve seen—with a horrified Mind,
that “sameness” of the skies;

be flogged by sordid planes,
playing “Tic-Tac-Toe,”
crisscrossing each other’s Long White Trails,
even making shapes, that could pass,
(I kid you not):
Like your Sacred “Star of David,”

or creating spiralled clouds,
such as I’d never seen my entire life.
I would, That I could Return
to my Youth’s Crisp, Blue Skies,
for I’m Loathe of looking up,
and seeing instead an “opaqued” Sun,
and “Pale Blue” sky…).
~~~~

(NOTE: except for Intro), Permission is Granted for Copying, Duplication, and Divulgation, provided it includes Attribution, esp, to Ms Gruen’s Book’s Character which Inspired it: “Water for Elephants.” And The Dedication to Former Weathercaster, Mr. Dane Wigington, a True Hero, in his Own Right.

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1991 “Clarisse TWU Interview” – (Uploaded by son, on YouTube)

Hi Everyone,

My Fractured Wrist seems to be Healing Well; the February 19 (2.5 hrs-long) Surgery, repairing a really bad Fracture, has now turned me “slightly Bionic” (LOL), with a Titanium Plate and 7 impossibly-long Screws, all the way, from my Outer Wrist Bone, halfway Down my Forearm (I’ll Upload the Pictures I took of my arm, later, for I’m still functioning solely with my Non-Dominant, LH, a Stylus, and a obstemperous Tablet.

This Entry’s Main Purpose is to Showcase a former Classmate’s Story on me, my Music and Its raisón d’être, the final product  of which I’d never seen before, until my Son, was able to Digitize it from its original “Sony BetaMax,” and uploaded it on his Channel, instead of “Gaea’s Midwife,” which is where it belongs.

So, Thanks to my Son, for his Translating Formats, and to my former Journalism classmate Rayvia Morgan, TWU – Texas Woman’s University – Denton, Texas, Class of 1991, for this nice, final Version of her Story on a Broadcasting Assignment (Thank You, both: Rayvia, and […] 🙂 gmf (aka: ma89)

Clarisse(sm) 1991 TWU Interview – Enjoy  :))

https://youtu.be/eQoJuYvQelw

NOTE:  This Video was for School Assignment Ms Morgan had. It was subsequently broadcast numerous times over a three (3) year period on TWU’s Cable channel. I didn’t have Cable–only the Betamax Video–and it was friends and fans who’d be tellling me: “I saw you on TV, last night…” Where (c) is concerned, Rayvia personally handed me the Betamax video–then already only used by Pros; the Reproduction of and (c) permission allowance, are fully implied and understood, by her very actions. Any question should be addressed to me, at lightseeker89 at icloud dot com, (NO SPAM, or TROLLS, PLEASE). UPDATE: My Bad, so, some Information is either changed and/or omitted.

Love IS The ONE and Only Way, to a Better Tomorrow. ma89💗

Gorgeous, Calm Sea. Photo by Adam Dodge, cc ça. 2009 Seattle, WA, USA

Wrist Surgery Done-Recovery Begins

My Baldwin Studio Upright, Companion of 25+ Yrs. Bought Spring 1991
Gonna Miss playing You, Buddy! Photo, cc 2015, by Clarisse℠ , York, PA, USA

Hi Everyonne… (Pardon the misspellings; they’re so frequent now, it’d be impoîssie to try & corrrct them all–i.e.: Time-conuhvsuming/also, due to pain med side-effectsc …)

Surgery went eell lasted longer than predicted, wrist VERHY Painnvful2 of 5 fingers feel as iff they’re Broken. The slighest touch & they go into a 😩😩😩🤕😷😷…

Must go now!!!

Namasté cg n :-/

 post-Surgery arm. 

ma89/aka: Gaea’s Modwife 

Diagnosis: Fractured Distal Ulnar; Additional Fractures

Both Blogs Going Into Hiatus

UPDATE:

Surgery Recovery Moving Quickly, slowly Reverting to Right Hand. 

Just a quick entry to let everyone know what ws done, and still needs to be done. 

Stitches came off 2 weeks after Surgery and a new Custom-molded, (I’d rather have had a Cast than a Splint. (I’ll say more later; but can’t Complete this, rt now. 
Here are some photos, though: I’l label them later;)

 

  

ma89

_____________

Hi Everyone,

Things happen5, which completely send us on a tailspin–only to hope and pray  we don’t land without our Parachute open.

Such is the case here: Two (2) weeks ago, an unfortunate fall has left my right hand incapacitated at the wrist.

At a gas station, I tripped on a Pothole, near the pump, fell landing full on, straight on my right wrist. I couldn’t even get up.

Calls for Help, brought a Driver and a Policeman, who–seeing how bad my wrist looked–Called an Ambulance, which took me to Lancaster Regional Medical. A temporary cast was applied.

Surgery is tomorrow morning! Two plates will be inserted bypassing the wrist to connect right hand to the forearm.

My piano playing days are over!

I can’t describe how it felt…, the realization I’ll never play it again, like before!😩😩😩✔️

Entry POST-Surgery: 

XRay Courtesy  of OSS-York,  & its Radiology Dept.
Post-Surgery X-Ray, with 1 plate on wrist & Forearm+7Screws

Little bandages (and Custom-Molded Splint) Applied

A 2.5-hr-long Surgical procedure  followed by upteen PT Sessions, will partiaĺly restore range of motion.

Right now, it’s really hard doing it all using my Non-Dominant hand.

Threrefore, effective immediately, both blogs, (this one, and Gaea’s Midwife), are on Hiatus.

Namastè, Everyone, ManicArtist89 🌸💧

Lovely Short Dream Lesson I’ve Found

While leafing through an old Notebook–filled with Poetry, Insights, Essays, etc–I came Across this very short, May 20, 2004 Entry of a Dream Lesson I’d woken-up with, in my head. Here it is:

“To whom do you offer assistance?” Was the question posed by the Traveler;

“To Everyone, according to Their needs,” was the reply given.

__________________
Do with this what you may! ma89🌸

Since my Knowings of Life, give me an Understanding that: “Coincidences are God’s way of pointing us into a certain action, or direction,” I tend to Follow the .

I was actually looking for a Poem I wished to Post, and ran straight into this Dream, instead. It would be Nice if whoever this Entry Speaks to, or be Useful for, in some ways, to let us know, and see where it takes us.

Have a Lovely Day, filled with the Principles of the Sanskrit word: “Namastè” ma89🌸

What Makes a Friendship, a *Friend*-*ship?*

(by Necessity, this wil have to be sort of Generic, and non-specific to either time nor circumstance--lest anyone may be adversely 
affected)

It is incredibly frustrating–dealing with the vagaries of living with Attention Deficit Disorder; 4 Concussions, (3 in my Childhood, from falling, or running away from Bullies; one from being Assaulted at a Drive-in Theater, as a Young Adultall four Injuring the back of the Head, right at the bottom of the Skull; all four affecting my Frontal Lobe–nowadays, though the causes (war, rather than childhood carelessness, bullies) are different, the resulting “TBI,” or “Post-Concussive Syndrome”  is identical, and devastating.

When One must go through Life, with these added (Invisibly pervasively-disruptive, yet nearly-undetectable), dis-Abilities, misunderstandings, missed-out Social Cues, misinterpreted Actions, Disastrous Decisions, and/or Reactions are indeed par for the course, and (hard as it may be to Forgive OneSelf One’s perceived Guilt, or Pain), it is at these times it is Imperative we Lift Up our View, striving to See the Bigger Picture(s).

It is also Essential to Cultivate within One’s Self the Capacity of Total and Complete Forgiveness of Self–for Your Actions; of Others–for becoming inadvertently Hurt, (at times) Furious, (frequently) Angry and Frustrated enough to End the formerly Great Friendship. When this occurs, I’m unsure to Whom I feel more Compassion, and Sorrow for: The Friend, who in their Hurt State of Mind, Huffs and Puffs, indignantly, (leading the Other to make even more Confused, likely-uneeded, premature, impulsive, regrettable) Decisions–the Friendship Cracked Open…; Friends-no more; or the Other, who in their Unreliably Frontal Lobe’s Confusion and Perplexing Thought Process, Acts, or Says Something Irrevocably-Unpardonable…, at least, by the average Human Being, anyway–only to (if not immediately), soon after, albeit, too late, wish they could take it back.

For the Second time in five (5) years, my (Invisibly dis-)Abled, (miswired) Brain, caused a Rift with the second of my two Best Friends–Who, in turn, (Interpreting my Innocently-Meant Efforts at Mitigating a Greater Stress on the Friendship), as Insultingly-Disrespectful; I’ve no Idea, at this time, whether and if our Friendship can or will survive my brain’s malfeasance.

The Consequences from Miscommunicated Intentions            

(It’s been three months, since I began writing this; and truthfully, I don’t remember where I intended to go with this. Nonetheless, the portions I Had written before, are still relevant. Moreover, anyone who experiences any and/or all the above or similar conditions, will Understand perfectly where I intended to go with it, and be able to fill in the blanks. As for me, frankly, apologizing constantly gets old very fast…, it can even get you fired–this latter one I’ve experienced myself, so I Know it to be True! Therefore, no apologies for an unfinished post; the Third One in One day–Oops! I must be Manic😞…                                                           

Bipolar : After an Angry/Violent Episode

A few months ago, my Best Friend and I, (both of us having Manic Depressiion), had a falling out, over the conditions in my apt.(she tends to forget my “Invisible dis-Abilities” only now, brought to light). Once she was done sermonizing me, a few “less than delicate” words were exchanged–we parted in unfriendly terms. Though I’d texted her forbidding her from telling anyone what she’d seen, she did report me to the Housing and shortly after, I was notified of an out-of-season Inspection. Because she’d shown signs of becoming abusive in her Textings to me, soon after we fell out, I sent her a rueful Text, saying I was sorry but I was temporarily blocking out her number. She must still be mad at me (shouldn’t it be me mad at her?). Missing her Frienship, I’ve recently Unblocked her Number, and sent her a Friendly Text letting her know of it. She hasn’t replied.

My point being: We, Manic Depressives have such Passionate hot heads, it is HARD for us to back off, once we made a mistake–especially, when we think we’re right. I think in Warda’s and mine case, we BOTH made mistakes: 1. Her, for judging me, without knowing (acknowledging) all the facts; and 2. Me, for my poor way of handling it (forbidding her from divulging it, which translated into the VERY THING I didn’t wish to see happen (fear of a surprise inspectiom). Ultimately, the decision to resume the (much missed) Friendship, rests on her choice now. I’ve reached out to he via Texting, and a Phone call (I SO-dislike caller ids). Now, I’ll wait and see, and–though I do realize some of her behaviors and actions are a function of our mutual Conditions, and therefore, not truly “her fault”–another function of Manic Depression is an inordinate sense of Pride; this one is more difficult to recognize for what it is, and accept, so we may deal with it (such as in apologizing). Unfortunately, Warda will never do that; consequently, our Friendship dwindles, and will continue to do so, into just a Memory 👣, sadly!